Ricochet by Krista Ritchie EPUB & PDF – eBook Details Online
- Status: Available for Free Download
- Authors: Krista Ritchie
- Language: English
- Genre: Billionaire Romance
- Format: PDF / EPUB
- Size: 2 MB
- Price: Free
I fucked up.
That’s the only thought I have when I digest my surroundings. A live
DJ blasts music from wall-engulfed amps while people guzzle colored
drinks. My youngest sister, Daisy, sips beer from a Solo cup, scouting her
model friends. I fear that she’ll pull a guy over and try to hook us up—to
take my mind off Loren Hale. Five hours ago, I believed a house party
would be a safe choice.
Not true.
So. Not true.
I should be chastely tucked beneath my comforter, sleeping through
the New Year’s riffraff at my place with Rose. Only days ago, Lo—my best
friend, my boyfriend, literally a guy who encompasses my entire life—left
for rehab. Rose and I spent a full Monday packing my belongings. And I
sorted through pictures, knickknacks and valuables, bursting into tears in
random spurts. Besides clothes and toiletries, what’s mine was Lo’s. I felt
like I was going through a divorce.
I still do.
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Only an hour in, Rose called movers and paid them to finish packing
my old apartment and unpacking at our new house. She bought a fourbedroom villa near Princeton with five acres of sprawling, lush land and a
white wrap-around porch, black shutters and purple hydrangeas. It reminds
me of the southern homes in Savannah or the Ya-Ya Sisterhood. When I told
her this, she stood with her hands on her hips, appraising the building with
those powerful, yellow eyes. Then she broke into a smile and said, “I
suppose so.”
The isolation from male bodies doesn’t stop my flyaway mind from
traveling to bad places. Mostly, I worry about Lo. I toss and turn at night
only to have to swallow large doses of sleeping pills to rest. I miss him.
And before he left—I never imagined a world without Lo here. My throat
closed up at the idea, my heart dropped and my head spun. Now that the
moment has arrived, I realize that he took a piece of me with him. When I
told this to Rose, she patted my shoulder and said I was being irrational.
That’s easy for her to say. She’s intelligent, confident and independent.
Everything I’m not.
And I don’t think…I don’t think many people can really understand
what it’s like to be so invested in someone—to share every single moment
and then to have them ripped from you. We have an unhealthy, codependent relationship.
I know this.
And I’m trying to change, to grow beyond him, but why does that have
to be a stipulation?
I want to grow with him.
I want to be with him.
I want to love Lo without people telling me that our love is too much.
One day, I hope we’ll get there. Hope, that’s all I have to go on right
now. It’s my driving force. It’s literally what keeps me standing.
The first few days in withdrawals tortured me, but it helped that I hid
in my room. I refused to see the real world until I could push past the most
fervent urges. So far, I’ve contained my sexual needs by drowning in selflove. I’ve thrown out half of my porn to try to appease Rose and to
convince myself that I’m on the path to recovery like Lo. But I’m not so
sure that’s the case. Not when my stomach clenches at the thought of sex.
But mostly, I want to have sex with him.
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